Dedicacion a las Latinas de la violencia domestica  ~ Dedication to the Latina women of Domestic Violence  English Version

Por Blaine Lukkar, Consejero Bilingue de FavorHouse

Este articulo es dedicada a las Latinas que hacen todo lo posible para sobrevivir la violencia domestica y a los familiares y amistades de una conocida que esta sufriendo. No hay ninguna excusa para la violencia domestica. La violencia domestica no es solamente un asunto personal, sino un problema publico que afecta cientos de hogares en nuestra comunidad.

En esta columna, ofrecere informacion sobre los efectos de violencia para la victima, los ninos, la familia y las amistades. Refleccionare sobre las siguentes preguntas: ?Porque es tan dificil salirse de una relacion abusiva?, ?Porque el abusa?, ?Que enfrenta la Latina abusada?

Si Ud. tiene preguntas con respeto a su propia situacion, favor de comunicarse con FavorHouse a 434-1177. Somos consejeros certificados de la violencia domestica y ofrecemos nuestros servicios gratis y con un compromiso de privacidad.

Ademas de definir cualquier acto fisico que causa dano (pegando, empujando, pellizcando, forzando sexo, ahorcando…) la violencia domestica se trata de un patron de comportamiento que establece y mantiene control y poder sobre la victima del abusador. El abuso domestico tiene todo que ver con control. El abusador sabe perfectamente lo que hace y cada accion abusiva es bien calculada. No hay ninguna excusa que perdona la violencia domestica y Ud. no tiene la culpa por las acciones de su pareja. Andar tomado o “perder el control” no perdona sus acciones. Abusadores insultan, humillan, amenazan con deportarla, le echan la culpa de todo, manipulan y aislan a su pareja como tacticas de controlar. Abusadores hacen hasta lo imposible para que su victima no se salga de la relacion.

Nuestro compromiso es ayudarla a mantenerse lo mas segura posible y apoyarla planificar una salida segura si eso se decide hacer. Entre mas entienda las tacticas del abuso domestico, mas preparada estara de protegerle a Ud. y a sus hijos.

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This article is dedicated to the Latina women who do all they can to survive domestic violence and to the families and friends of a loved one who is suffering. There is no excuse for domestic violence. Domestic violence is not just a personal matter, but rather a public problem that affects hundreds of households in our community.

In this column, I will offer information about the effects of violence on the victim, the children, family and friends and address the following questions: Why is it so difficult for women to leave an abusive relationship? Why does he abuse? What does the abused Latina face?

In addition to defining any physical abuse that causes harm (hitting, pushing, pinching, forcing sex, strangling, etc.), domestic violence refers to a pattern of behavior that establishes and maintains control and power over the abuser´s partner. Domestic abuse is all about control. The abuser is completely aware of what he does and clearly calculates each abusive action. There is no excuse for domestic violence and his actions are not your fault. Being drunk or ¨losing control¨ does not pardon what he does. Abusers use insults, humiliation, threats of deportation, blaming, manipulation and isolation as some of their control tactics. They do everything possible to make sure their victims cannot leave the relationship.

We are here to help you stay as safe as possible and to assist you in planning a safe exit if you decide to leave. The more you understand the dynamics of domestic abuse, the better prepared you will be to protect yourself and your children.

If you have questions about your own situation, please contact FavorHouse at 434-1177. We are certified domestic violence counselors and we offer all of our services privately and free of charge.

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